Chapter 20.

And this is the rest of our lives.

I woke up to the most horrible news today. I met a guy when I was 19. He was friendly, funny and the most welcoming person I had seen at that time. It was then that I decided, "He's going to be something HUGE." Was it the way he spoke or the way he analyzed everything, I still don't know. All I know is I never remained friends with him and today, he is not there anymore. His talent, his words and his sense of humor are all going to be linked with the past now. As of today, Zain Haider is dead. A debater, an actor and a genuinely nice human being, I guess all he had was this little time to make us all laugh, to awe us with his talent and then, well, walk away.

Perhaps obituaries will be written on Facebook, names will become hashtags, a text message will circulate and then we will all move on. We will occasionally remember him, shed a tear and we will move on. We won't come out of the bubble we are creating or fear God that ours might be the next name spreading like wild fire. We will still write notes on social media of thank yous and sorrys but we won't come up in person and say it all. People deserve more than that, our friends and family deserve more than that. We deserve to be more than a name as a hashtag with everyone's condolences. Zain Haider deserved to be much more than the 'LSE boy who passed away at 25'

Well done, world. 

Chapter 19

This one is for all of us. The ones who need to stop and take a breath. The ones who need to remember those we cut loose.

In the loving memory of the amazing people that we had.

Now, lets move on.

Chapter 18

The story of a Once-Upon-A-Time pregnant woman

I was 15-20 KGS above my normal weight, having the most difficult time adjusting to the married life in a new country and though it should have been a cherry on top, it was s h o c k I n g for me to find out about my pregnancy. I was hardly able to take care of myself and a surprise baby here?

Well, tears were shed, lethal words thrown towards my spouse and I really did think it was the end of the world. Until I accepted it and did everything I could. I slept right, ate right and did right by the tiny dot in my belly. Until it hurt. And I thought it was normal. Until my ultrasound. Until my medicines. Until the moment I couldn't hear the heartbeat. Until 3 weeks after when I aborted and flushed it down after 3 hours.

It was heartbreaking and I always shed a tear. I had decided I wanted a girl and prayed for one. I picked a name and I looked at the cutest clothes. I had planned my entire life in a matter of 4 weeks. Till I had nothing to look forward to.

Fuck you if you treat a miscarriage as a casual affair. If you think it was just an incident and everyone goes through it. Fuck you for not supporting your wives through it. Fuck you if 'it happens to everyone' was uttered even a single time by you.

It is a precious gift, a precious feeling and something that is only yours. It is something you should be open about, you should love and you should celebrate. It is natural, for fucks sake.
Celebrate it. Enjoy it.
:)